I once read a story about two brothers who had an alcoholic dad. One of them became an alcoholic and the other one never touched alcohol in his life and also went on to become a medical doctor. When asked what influenced their choices in life, the first one said, “I watched my dad,” and the second one also said, ” I watched my dad.”

Two people, the same situation, different outcomes, both of them looking at their dad, the question now becomes what were they looking at and how did their view influence and affect their choices?

One saw himself as a victim of circumstance, and the other saw a circumstance that would not define him.
I have mentioned before that what you focus on, you give strength to, which suggests that no situation, problem, or obstacle in life is big enough to stop you from leading a successful life.

I will never undermine some very challenging situations people go through, as unfortunately, bad things happen to good people yet I will also say with a degree of boldness that you have a choice whether to remain a victim to any situation in life. We live in a fallen world, and things don’t go perfect, people we look up to fail and disappoint us and things do fall apart but whatever situation you find yourself, know this, you are the master to your own destiny. When I say master, I mean, taking charge of the course of your life and willing yourself in the direction that God desires for you. According to Jeremiah 29: 11, God’s thoughts are only and always good thoughts:


“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11 NKJV

This is God’s will and desire for everyone, and this should be the yardstick, not anything else. So ask yourself, the situation you find yourself in presently, is it a peaceful situation, do you have peace about it? Is there a desirable future in that, is it a hopeful situation? If your response is in the negative, then you have the responsibility to change the course. Not all situations require you to physically walk away. Some situations may require a change and shift in attitude and approach( and that is actually a huge step in the right direction). Take a look at how the book of Romans puts it.

“Don’t copy the behaviour and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”
Romans 12 : 2 NLT

The victim mindset and mentality are so prevalent now that it puts so many people in boxes and renders them ineffective. The world wants to make a victim out of everyone and every situation, that is known as a world’s way of behavior, the world’s custom, don’t copy it, don’t allow it be your way.

Remember, I am not saying, there are no victims out there, if you are a victim of any situation, I am really sorry and I have good news for you, God gives beauty for ashes, He wants to take every ash, pain, regret, sorrow, hurt and turn them around and make something beautiful from that situation, if you will allow Him. Do not remain a victim for whatever reason, cry out for help if you need to, talk to somebody, look for books to read to help you in that particular situation, read the bible ( the best of all ) .

The devil wants you to remain a victim, and he is always delighted when you always have someone to blame for any mishap. Someone might be responsible for bad happening to you, agreed, but they are not responsible for your ultimate decision to not move forward, you have the ability to shut any door.The end purpose of a victim mind-set is to steal your hope. You can not be hopeful and remain a victim as hope comes from God, not from the world. Remember, what it says in Jeremiah, God’s plan is to give you hope and a future, so when you renew your mind through discovering God’s plan for you, you get transformed from being a victim to becoming a Victor, transformed from focusing on what went wrong to what can become right, from hopelessness to full of hope.

Please send an email if you would like prayers for anything to :

bloggingwithkay@yahoo.com .

I would love to read your comments as well.


Much blessings

Kingdom Durogene